mailing a cat

lulu is going to live with her uncle.

should i poke holes in the box for her?

friday june 5th

1st day of unpaid leave

9:34 a.m.

so far……….

chocolate chip pancake

diet root beer

porn

shower

master of puppets

opened beer

stayed tuned.

vamp tranny go!

my bag is packed.

i even have a dress and make up.

here i go.

yay.

tacos are going to get killed so hard.

beers are going to suffer as well.

running a train on this muther fucker yall.

woooooo!

g=hhwwwaadddtt?

no docking please.

thank you.

-beefbeef

today…………

i failed at buying dress clothes.

ate some really good roadside bbq.

(thank you old lady that made it.)

watched a ton of yo gabba gabba!

i am listening to rush.

super ready for arizona.

ready to murder some tacos.

nature work all kinds of jacked up magic

lookin this please

this week

began brain dump / toad’s wheelie ride
good week for the boy
crack the skye non stop
plenty of black coffee
fraggle rock
chicken nachos
finished off a 100 pack #11 blades
potty training (it’s going well)
busted seat post clamp
patience for lulu
still cutting teeth
hail and lots of rain
shuffling on marta
fish tacos
marie sharp’s habanero pepper sauce
grabbed a copy of blood meridian
water levels almost back to normal
back pains
zombie dreams
easter candy freak outs
black jelly beans turn doodoo black
other stuff too
yay! for staurday huh
wooooo
outside painting tomorrow
cutting the grass
stuff man

bitch i ride the marta bus! oh and the train as well.

it may take me a while to explain this.

i’m really not the best story teller.

transfer at five points.

east bound to king memorial station.

this is where i saddle up on that cheezer called #32.

what wonderful things a see everyday.

such a beautiful chance to take in the humans.

i love it.

i do.

so i wait for #32 on this monday in october.

while i stand thinking about the defender dvd i recieved as a gift………..

a lady with the wild eye walks my way.

i don’t mean wild eye like she is looking for a donkey ride.

it’s more like the eye of a pro gazing through crazy vision goggles.

she has a smaller towel or something like a towel around her waist.

she is clutching this with a serious grip.

a hurricane could not blow this thing off.

as we wait for the bus she is standing with her back to me.

there is a pretty large wet brown soaked patch on her clothing.

she did have shorts on under the towel.

this wet spot is quite large and creeps up her back.

her legs however are clean.

i’m thinking peepoo is what hit her with no warning.

it didn’t take but a few seconds for me to step back and continue waiting in a different spot.

she made her way to the other side of the driveway where the buses pull in.

i kind of forgot about her really.

about this time a see #32 humping on around the corner.

it is also about the same time a load of #32 regulars make their way off the train.

so we all fall in line to get a good seat on the bus.

i grabbed a seat in the back where i usually sit.

my window is open.

i close it.

then i realize that the bus smells funny.

i opened my window back up to get some fresh air going.

this little switch clicked in my soft brain.

it’s the turd water on that lady that i am breathing in.

i see her sitting about four seats back up front.

around the same time people are starting raise a ruckus.

she is getting clowned super hard.

teen passengers are yelling things like “she got the loose booty”

and “she done shit on herself”.

occasionally she looks back with this wild look.

she is mumbling to herself and shifting in her seat.

all this moving around in the seat is making things worse.

i got out my phone to call home.

my plan was to get off of the bus and catch the next one.

i wanted to let my folk know that i might be a few minutes late.

it’s bad yall.

i mean bad bad.

the dooky flukes were hitting the air with a plan of bacterial combat.

before i could get out of my seat the bus driver gets back in and we are off.

the over all mood of bus riders is sort one of “ooooo she so damn nasty”.

i agreed.

she was so damn nasty.

but she was also clearly crazy.

all of the shit people were yelling could upset this gal.

i don’t ever really chat with people on the bus.

but this was a special chance for me to get to know my fellow riders.

i ask the few people next to me to maybe not make fun of her.

they looked at me kind a like i was a stupid or something.

so i explained that she could get angry and fling that towel off of her waist.

i said that if i get any of her wet turds on me i would be very upset.

this made sense.

they had the look of oh my damn he is right.

the jokes died down a little.

i really think that people were too distracted to do anything.

faces were getting covered up and noses were being pinched.

i’m not kidding when i say that old ladies were riding with their heads out the windows.

it must have looked really funny.

my head was out of the window for sure.

not long after we left the curb the bus driver knew what was happening.

he didn’t stop or anything though.

just kept on trucking.

i’m not really sure what he could have done.

25 minutes or so later she is still on the bus and i was at my stop.

you might imagine how thrilled i was to get off of #32.

so there you are.

that is my story for you.

diarrhea will and does happen.

it’s no joke.

big d is the untimate crippler.

it will strike you with no warning.

be safe friends.

knife sharp

so………..

x-acto number 11 blades are sharp.

i was making a routine cut yesterday at work.

my guess is that there was a rough spot on the straight edge.

??????

the blade jumped the straight edge.

not cool man.

i made some serious blood.

e.r. visit.

shots (fucking sucked).

pain killers rule.

they are wicked awesome when beers are involved.

i know what your saying.

don’t judge me man.

is this more like a dude you used to hang with?

it’s the same guy.

laugh is a bag of wet cookies.

i don’t know what that means.

later tater.

check in on this……..

http://www.sixweeksinportsaintlucie.blogspot.com/

because i am sharp i couldn’t link this proper.

sorry.

a good friend dookie platters is down in fl. for a minute doing his research.

you can learn about his adventures here.

he is a magical fellow.

that’s all.